Just Another Manic Monday

Heya, my few and current readers!!!! How's life? Good, good. Bet it's going a little smoother than mine!

Ugh. I have sooo much stress right now, but I'm trying to just pretend it's not there. It's not working, of course, but it's worth a shot.

Soooo my weekend!! Pretty uneventful. Josh is home (my best friend's boyfriend, and my good friend)!!!!!!!!!! Home from Chapel Hill, and boy, did I miss him. He's been there for me through a lot, and I love him to death. Sydney and he better get married (they've been together almost 2 and a half years, so I can see it). He came over, we played a game (SceneIt).

I had to get my Senior Project outline in today. Actually, it was due more than a week ago, but my advisor and I had momentary communication issues. God, my topic is particularly boring, yet interesting. It's War Protest Poetry, which I think is a really cool topic, but delving into it for an 8-10 page paper is kind of kicking my ass. I hate Senior Project. I haven't any idea how it helps me with the real world. I'm just writing a paper about something I'm not exactly fascinated in and making a product that I would've made anyway (a portfolio of all my work).

I really wish more people were willing to go on the Senior Trip in June, but all of my friends suck. They just want to stay in this little bo-hunk town and not have tons of fun with me and my beautiful baby (thanks, guys, cough cough). I actually can't wait until the trip. I mean, 4 days with my baby in Florida, having a blast? Heck yes!!! I just hope it's not the two of us going.

I miss her. All the time, actually. I wish I could see her more often. On the 28th, I'll be staying with her at her cousin Audrey's house, where we shall get partially snockered and attack each other in a very good way. XDXDXD I do love her, though. Since things can't get much worse between us, considering my mother's insistence that we can't see each other "until we tell the truth", Kellie and I are finally considering telling my parents that we are thinking about dating. "We didn't do it, out of respect for your wishes, but now that you don't seem to care that much, we're considering dating." God, I hope it works and Mama lets me start seeing her again. She's coming with me to Greensboro, you know. And she already bought my engagement ring...$1800, which is entirely too much. But I love her. I know it hasn't been that long, only 9 months, but we've been in love for a year and a half! I just want to be with her. I know it's what I want.

I have figured out why I don't feel nearly as guilty for kissing Jonathan as I did for kissing Britt. First of all, it was the intensity. Jonathan just kissed me. Britt made out with me all night. It aslso has something to do with my own emotions. I felt most guilty ab0ut Britt because I knew that she didn't love me. She was just using me. But knowing that Jonathan really does love me is making it easier for me to not reveal what happened...Is that good or bad?

Yeah well. Whatevs. XD Thanks for all your support!!!